Monday, June 17, 2013

Dear self (and others who need words to feel cool on the inside)

This morning on my way to school when no radio station wanted to play Justin Timberlake, I turned it off and tuned in. I talk to myself a lot and often underestimate my ability to actually make sense. (Well, contrary to my brother and cousin’s belief.) I don’t know why I felt the urge to literally be myself, and that sounds painfully cliché and sappy, but I just wanted to feel comfortable/confident with zero face paint and an ok hair day. You know? Sometimes you just need to feel it more than look it. It was my first day of summer class and I guess I had only myself to rely on. New place, new people, new term, new notebook…recipe for major awkwardness. Well back to the part about me making sense on occasion…as I was thinking out loud, I realized how easy it is to connect with others when you’re being exactly you. It’s nearly impossible to do so when you’re trying to be someone else. You’re kind of….lost and confused then. How do you connect genuinely when you connected while you weren’t even being genuine? Right?! SO I decided that I wasn’t going to swipe mascara on or talk in a British accent (I’ve pulled one off before, for the record)….I was just going to walk in and let it be known that I have arrived.

Just kidding. I just walked in and sat in the last row gracelessly twiddling my hair. But the whole spiel about connecting and being genuine and whatnot has been remedial to my soul. For future references, you know?
Ehh I’m just having a moment, excuse me.  

Sincerely,

Someone with one too many feelings 

6 comments:

  1. You should keep thinking out loud more often....and of course, most people make sense, you know? So why not you! haha!

    Absolutely...being yourself is more of a favor to yourself than to others, because if we are trying to be something else... I guess we just lie to ourselves more than to others.

    And, if we pretend to be something that we're not, we do get lost...

    Oh, so....just be you, always :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. WOW... What an amazing skill you have. Hats off madam!
    Although iam not an avid follower of facebook or any book as such.. but just happened to read thru your first blog (i frankly don't believe it could be your first). But it just shows how wonderful the magic of words can be..
    you must have hooked quite a few like me from the onset till the closing lines..
    this much iam pretty sure..
    It had so much of finesse and was just magical & enchanting to so the least..
    Lovely write up..
    Definitely will have to try those cookies with the clarified butter some day..
    But for now .. congratulations to you ...
    You have a rare quality that anybody would envy to possess..
    the ability to express and get noticed..
    go on.. waiting for more...

    Regards
    Ateed

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ateed bhai, I cannot thank you enough for your encouragement and generous comments. It all means so much!!! Really it does. It's people like you and words like that, that truly keep me going at it. Thank you kindly!!!

      xx Zareen

      Delete
  3. Being yourself is so important (but crazy hard sometimes, which is so weird). But it is also important to be the BEST of yourself and to try to overcome your weaknesses (e.g. shyness, low self-esteem...). My advice to you would be - be yourself, but try to get out of your comfort zone and start talk to someone! (Not that I know if you have tried or anything. I don't mean to patronize, just reacting on your post with very little to kow about you and thinking out loud, but also projecting my own experiences with being shy and not exactly fit in often. Oh my, that was a long sentence, sorry!)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I meant for my first comment to be under this but I'm not sure how, but I accidentally commented it under your first post. Loved that too! But I felt the need to clarify (:

    ReplyDelete
  5. I agree with you about being yourself cause then it's easier to make friends.. khmm not really but easier than if you were trying to someone else if you know what I mean.

    ReplyDelete